Comparisons That Lead To Destruction PT.2

By Chidi Udemezue

chidi comparison

Hey everyone, I’m really excited to be featuring again on stylishlyinspired! As Anashe previously mentioned, we will both be discussing and sharing our take on the same theme. This week, the theme is “comparisons.”

Now, the very first blog post I wrote was on comparisons.
“Comparison is the thief of joy.”
I already knew that this was an area of my personality that I needed to gain some control over.
It is so easy, especially in this day and age, and within our generation; to let the lies of social media and everyday life, contend with our realities and the truths that God says about us.
I believe that God will continue to allow tests and trials to happen in your life until you learn to overcome them with Him and with His word. Which is what I believe He did with me in the area of comparing myself to others. I want to share the lessons that I learnt from Him with you!

Genesis 4:3-5 (NIV)
In the course of time Cain brought some of the fruits of the soil as an offering to the Lord.
And Abel also brought an offering – fat portions from some of the firstborn of his flock. The Lord looked with favour on Abel and his offering,
But on Cain and his offering he did not look with favour. So Cain was very angry, and his face was downcast.

For those of you who don’t know, Cain and Abel were the children of Adam and Eve, the first siblings in the bible. It is from them, that I truly learnt why I shouldn’t compare myself to another.
When the Holy Spirit led me to this particular scripture, I got a couple points from it, the main two being:

  1. Service//Offering
  2. Comparison

The overall theme however from these two points were why I should never compare myself, my gifts, my offering, my service to anyone else.

For reasons unknown to us, Cain’s service/offering of fruit was unacceptable to God. My initial thought was because it was fruit and not meat. However, the bible says in 2 Corinthians 9:7 “…give what you have decided in your heart to give…” my understanding from that is it is not WHAT you give, but HOW you give unto the Lord.
Why was Cain’s offering not acceptable? Maybe it was his attitude? Nonchalance? Pride? Lack of humility? It could have been anything, we don’t know.

However, Abel came, and his offering was much better received. Maybe he came with joy, obedience, and willingness to go above and beyond for God regardless of everything. Maybe he came with nothing missing in terms of his heart and he just wanted to give onto the Lord.

From this, I got that God wants our service and our offering to be like Abel’s

  • Undiluted
  • Pure
  • No strings attached
  • Joyful

Cain could see that God looked with favour upon Abel and he immediately compared himself to his brother.
For me, you can only see and look at someone enviously when they are doing something that you know you aren’t doing.

Again, it’s not about the fact that you give/serve, but HOW you give/serve.

Cain saw that in the eyes of God, his service did not match or live up to Abel’s. The bible says in Genesis 4:5 “…Cain was very angry, and his face was downcast.” In comparison, Cain immediately turned to sin – anger.

Even in his sin, God still came and spoke to Cain and warned him in v.6-7:
“Then the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.”

In the comparison, sin is already waiting for you, but in order for you to overcome the sin, you must overcome the comparison. You must rule over it. How do you rule over it? Go back and check your motives. Are you serving/giving purely? Out of joy? With no strings attached? If not, take these motives to God and let Him deal with the root of the problem.

God warned Cain. (Just like I’m sure God warns me and God warns you. God may not talk to you directly like He did Cain, but He definitely does speak, the question is are you listening?) However, Cain did not listen and ultimately killed his brother Abel.
Although Abel died at the hand of Cain, the sin from comparison ultimately led to Cain’s spiritual death, which I think is worse than a physical death.
Comparison truly is the thief of joy! It robbed Cain of the presence of God (spiritual death) “…and I will be hidden from your presence;” and he suffered for it!

Ultimately what I am trying to say to those who are reading is this; please do not compare your life, your gifts, and your service to those of another!
Use what God has given you to the very best of your ability and just like God was with Abel, God will be happy with you.
The end result of your comparison is never worth it! Be content and happy in your portion and watch God bless you!

Much love,

© Chidi Udemezue, 04/2017,

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Comparisons That Lead To Destruction


Hey, lovelies this week is going to be a little different, I have Chidi with me and she will be posting on Thursday. We also have a theme this week which is comparisons and we will be sharing our different takes on the topic.

I’m going to be focusing on the comparisons made by some Christians towards non-Christians and also the comparisons that occur between different churches.

God tells us to love thy neighbour, but do we really? Do you find yourself quick to judge once you know someone is not a Christian?

As Christians we are made to follow the footsteps of Christ, however, sometimes we can forget that we are not perfect. We are not above or below people, we were all made equal no matter our title “Most assuredly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master; nor is he who is sent greater than he who sent him.” (John 13:16). I have seen it in some Churches and Christians where they perceive themselves higher than those who are not Christian. kind of treating them the way the Jewish people treated the gentiles like outcasts in Ancient Palestine. Thinking they were not holy enough to be near, quick to judge a gentile than another Jew. That behaviour of thinking is not right, we cannot compare ourselves higher than a non-Christian and favour a Christian. We may never know what is happening behind closed doors, the Christian might be a bigger sinner than the non-Christian, the only difference is one knows Christ and the other is waiting to know of Christ. Instead of Christians comparing themselves to non-Christians, we should be winning their souls, seeing them for who they can become in Christ not who they are without.

Another matter is churches competing with other churches, one believing to better than the other. This happens often, where competitions and comparisons arise between churches and they find themselves losing their main focus and doing things to be better than the other. We should know as Christians we are ALL in Christ, we ALL love and believe in the same Jesus and we ALL have a common goal to win souls to him as his disciples. However, it’s sad when you see comparisons lead to a destruction of churches and also lead to pride in some.

God made us all equal in him, its just some are waiting to be revealed of that. Instead of being like the Pharisees in the bible questioning Jesus as he feasted with the sinners, let us be like Jesus and also call sinners to repentance (Mark 2:13-17). Let’s put all negative comparisons aside and see the gem that God sees in everyone and helping them to reach it by receiving Christ. We should aim to bless people with the good news not to put down people with the fact that we have learnt the good news. Stay blessed!

The good that God sees in you, you should see in others.

A Love As Strong As Death


First things first, HAPPY EASTER! Hope everyone had a good one and attended a lovely service/mass. With that being said thought this week would be a great time to give you all a little Easter encouragement.

Easter for me this year opened a new understanding. Some may consider Easter a time of sorrow for the death of Jesus Christ, a time to remember the suffering and pain that Jesus endured on the cross. However, I don’t think Easter was ever meant to be a time of remembrance of the pain but a time of thanks and gladness for what Jesus did for us.

If Jesus had not died we would not have salvation, we would not have grace. We would be doomed and still be drowning in all our sins from the past and present. It’s a time to THANK God for the finished work at Calvary. Also, the most important thing to know is that Jesus had to die so that he might fulfil what was written in the scriptures, “After this, Jesus, knowing[a] that all things were now accomplished, that the Scripture might be fulfilled, said, “I thirst!”.” (John 19:28).

The death of Christ demonstrated the love that God has for us, it’s a love as strong as death (Songs of Solomon 8:6). Jesus was willing to die for us out of love, that we may be free from the bondage of sin and have life in abundance. So that we could live in God’s Grace and have His mercy towards us renewed every morning. “Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed, Because His compassions fail not. 23 They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:22-23).

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16). We were given eternal life through the death of our Lord Jesus Christ. Let us celebrate the goodness that came to us and not forget to thank God. Stay blessed!

Happy Easter 🙂

Do You Love Yourself?


Look in the mirror, do you like what you see? What do you see? A strong woman, with a beautiful face staring back at you? Or do you see a disappointment, an ugly imagery of who you wish you weren’t? Are you content with what you see?

When we look in the mirror we have a tendency to automatically self- evaluate. You can always try and convince yourself that you are comfortable with your body and who you are. But, if every time you look in the mirror a hint of disappointment and hatred comes, then you need to re-evaluate how you feel about yourself. If looking in the mirror and smiling is so difficult and you can’t even hype yourself up in the morning, then you need to re-evaluate how you feel about yourself. If you can’t even look in the mirror no more then you really need to re-evaluate.

Ladies, we all know how hard it is to love ourselves and our bodies in this day and age. Social media showing what the ideal woman should look like, all these “glamorous” Instagram girls. It’s truly hard to look at yourself and love what you see. So how do we fix this, how do we learn to love ourselves?. Well, it’s all about clearing our minds of the seeking VALIDATION toxin. We are so caught up in “fixing” the way we look to either to please the male gender or what social media says we should be. However, what about what God says we should be, the more we seek to please social media the more we end up displeasing God. We end up being ashamed of God’s creation (us). We forget that He is a God who doesn’t make any mistakes, He made us in His image. “So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.”(Genesis 1:27). The more we hate ourselves and how we look the more we are really hating God. Disapproving of what He has wonderfully made “I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made..”(Psalm 139:14).

It’s important to have self-acceptance and I KNOW I KNOW, easier said than done. Trust me, I’m a working progress myself. But just think of it this way, 1 step at a time.

1st step: Knowing that you don’t need validation from anyone but yourself and God.
2nd step: Knowing where you stand with yourself and how you feel about yourself. Finding those elements that make you disapprove yourself.
3rd step: Accepting that you have these feelings about yourself and you need to address them.
– once you have accepted, it is important to pray about it and ask God for forgiveness and strength to regain/obtain self-love.
4th step: Attacking the problem. Depending on what it is, for some this may take time.
– What I like to do is look in the mirror and compliment myself. This helps you to know that you don’t need to wait for people to compliment you. You already know you’re beautiful (not saying that you shouldn’t accept compliments, they are good also but you shouldn’t solely depend on them).
– Another thing I did was no make up for a month. We sometimes can get caught up with wearing makeup to make ourselves feel and look good. We end up accepting the person with the mask instead of the person under the mask. So it’s really good to spend some time off makeup and take pictures of your natural beauty. This really helped me and I started to love myself more and more and my smile from the beginning of the month to the end became more natural not forced. So try this if you think it will be helpful.
5th final step: Keep repeating every day and you will find yourself slowly changing the thoughts about yourself. You start to be more confident in your skin and just glowing with self-acceptance.

I know that sometimes along the way you may slip but the most important thing is to stop, take a breath and realise that you have fallen back. Then get back up again and continue on. The devil may try and persuade you to stay down but don’t give in, get BACK UP again. Stay blessed!

The only Validation you need is from yourself. 🙂

Look At Yourself, You’re Good

URRGHHHH! Who else is already done with this week? And it’s only TUESDAY! The last few weeks have been crazy, with lectures, handing in assessments, doing tests and managing a blog, it’s hectic. So, to all you other bloggers looking at this right now nodding your heads, I know I feel you.

Okay, last week was kind of a crazy one, filled with less good and more stressful, bad moments. It is times like these when you need God the most. You look left, you look right and all you see are people fighting their own battles that you know they won’t have time to aid in yours. It’s in these moments you can only truly depend on God to get you through and allow Him to be your comforter. “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).

There will honestly be times where you feel down, feel like giving up on the life that keeps pushing you down. Take it from someone who knows, these days are so draining, you feel so unaccomplished. You look at your failures, your messes in life and you just bring yourself back down into that hole full of low self-esteem, sadness and doubt. But as the song above “I’m good” by Tim Bownman Jr. says, sometimes you have to look at yourself and shake yourself out of that phase. Think about all the goodness that God has done to your life and let all that “grief” go. Tell yourself YOU”RE GOOD, with God you are always good, good things will always come to you. He doesn’t hold anything good from you “For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The Lord will give grace and glory; No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.”(Psalm 84:11) Just a short encouragement. Stay blessed!

P.s Just wanted to take this time to also thank you all for your support and love these past few months 🙂 . May God bless you all and much love from me ❤
You can now also reach me on Facebook and Twitter so stop by and say hi 🙂

“The day you accept yourself is the same day you’ll start to accept God. You’re made in his image” – Stylishly Inspired 🙂